is one eye enough?

Hmmm... What does it mean to have a log in your eye?

I got a little glimpse of what it feels like a couple of weeks ago.  

I woke up and felt something funny in my eye.  I reached to rub it (I know, I know...) and recoiled at my own touch.  My entire eye socket felt bruised.  It felt like it was swelling as I sat there.  I felt like I had been sucker punched in the eye.

I got out of bed and ran to the bathroom to inspect my eye in the mirror.  I was expecting to see something horrifying.  It felt terrible, at least it would be bloodshot or something.  Maybe it would be red and swollen.  But when I looked, it appeared perfectly normal.  What???

I checked closer, compared the two eyes.  Alas, there wasn't anything to speak of.  Maybe a little swelling, but could've been my imagination.

I complained to my mom.  "I feel like someone punched me out." When lamenting to my friend, she laughed, "Maybe someone did."  Ha. Ha.

It was bugging me terribly.  Focusing on things, moving my eyeball to look in different directions, it all hurt.  I held my eye shut with my palm and applied pressure.  It made it feel better. My friend suggested that it was a stye and said that it would help to apply a hot compress.  I took a washcloth doused in hot water and pressed it to my eye.  Such relief!

I went about my business, pathetically pressing a wet washcloth to the side of my face.  And I noticed something.

I never realized how important it was that both of my eyes work together.  Obviously, as I went about my business that day, I was only using one eye.

My perspective and perception was literally off.  I would reach for something and not realize that it was closer or farther away than I had estimated.  Everything looked more dim.  I had to focus harder to read (and I don't wear glasses or contacts). Everything was just generally harder to see.

I kept feeling a weird urge to say that I had a log in my eye.  Because seriously, that's what it felt like.

Then I was thinking...

The scriptures ask why we should take the speck out of our brother's eye when we have a huge log in our own. 

"Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye."  ~Matthew 7:3-5

The Lord charges us to first remove the log from our own eye, then take the speck out of our brother's eye.  I witnessed first hand what it felt like to be crippled in one eye--I probably would have been barely able to see the speck, much less help someone to remove it!  

My perception would be off, I would have ended up hurting the other person because I could not see clearly enough to properly remove the speck.  In reaching toward their face, I probably would have ended up accidentally jamming their eye with the force, because my estimation was off.

When we have sin in our own lives that needs to be rooted out, it messes up the way that we see.  We may be able to see the specks in other people's eyes, the problems that they need to take care of, but until we have taken care of our own, our perspective is off--we can't see clearly enough to give them the proper care that they need to remove the speck!  We would probably end up hurting them rather than helping them.

I'm not saying that we should ignore the sin of other people, on the contrary!  Out of love for our brothers and sisters in Christ, we should be ever ready to exhort them in the truth of the Word if they are in error.  However, I believe that we should always be looking to ourselves first and foremost to make sure that we don't have any logs in our eyes before trying to remove specks from others.

And sometimes, the log isn't obvious to everyone else.  It may not be clearly seen, but that doesn't make it any less the hurtful--to ourselves and to others.  

Hopeless Romance?

I have been accused of being... shall we say, a bit dramatic.

When I love something, I love it and want everyone else to love it too.  When I see something beautiful, I want all to see it and enjoy it with me.  When I experience something amazing, I want the whole world to share in my joy.

A lot of people don't see things the same way I do.

Something that I love, that I have found to be beautiful, doesn't always excite the person I am trying to desperately to share with.

I am a hopeless romantic.

I remember the last autumn that we spent living up north, we had a huge maple tree in our back yard.  This tree was massive, the trunk probably had a circumference of 9 feet.  In the fall, the leaves would turn all shades of yellow, orange, and red-- a canopy over the entirety of our picket-fenced backyard.  I remember, I believe I was 10 at the time, standing in our driveway staring at the tree which rose up a good 5-6 stories tall.  I remember reverence, awe, and utter enjoyment.  What majesty! I had lived in that house for 5 years, I had seen autumn, I had seen the tree turn colors before-- but my breath (not to mention my heart) was stolen away in that singular moment.  I just pointed it out to my mom and dad, "Look, isn't it pretty?"  

I've always been this way, and generally my parents attributed my drama and hopeless romance it to my reading too many books. I can see this-- it's probably true.  Over the years I have gotten more and more practical, and less and less romantic.  Why?  Because I felt dumb when I would get excited over the smell of the crisp spring air, or seeing the intricacies of snowflakes for the first time, trying to get everyone else to "see", but being disappointed when they shrug and act as if it's all normal.

Sure, it's all normal.

I know that, I was just in an imaginary world for a second.  Pardon my drama... again.

I think that this apathy, this nonchalance is a direct attack from the enemy, satan.  He hates hopeless romantics, why?

 I believe that there is true value in being a hopeless romantic.... actually I would change that term, I'm going to now call myself a hopeful romantic.  This is the epitome of what satan hates so much. And I'll tell you why.

Hopeful romance is the essence of the child-like faith that Jesus alluded to in Luke 18:

15 And they were bringing even their babies to Him so that He would touch them, but when the disciples saw it, they began rebuking them. 16 But Jesus called for them, saying, “Permit the children to come to Me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. 17 Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all.”

What are some of the attributes of children?  Excitement.  Creativity.  Simplicity.  Wonder.  Carefree.

My little 3-year-old sister will bound into the kitchen while I'm doing dishes and thrust a weed, little yellow flower on one end, dirt shaking onto the floor from the roots left on the other end, into my face, "Look, Amy!  This is for you!"  I gasp, smile, "Oh, thank you!  You're so sweet!" I take the weed and carefully place it in a little teacup of water as a vase.  My sister's grin widens, her eyes disappear into her rosy cheeks as she struts out of the kitchen feeling like a million bucks.

"From the mouth of infants and nursing babes You have established strength..."

~Psalm 8:2a

A hopeless cynic sees that weed as nothing but what it is, a weed.  A hopeful romantic sees that weed for what it really is, a gesture of love.  Being able to "see" like a child, to see the beauty of a weed as a flower, to take it as a token of affection from another child, is the epitome of hopeful romance.

So, what makes this romance hopeful instead of hopeless, and how can one see any sort of romance in a world so saturated with sin?  Asks the cynic.

My romance goes back to the cross. (Eph 5:25)  Jesus loves me, I was bought with a price. (1 Cor. 6:20)  He died that I might live. (John 3:16)  I once was dead in my sin, naked, squirming in my blood. He came along, "Live!" He breathed. (Eze 16:4-6) He picked me up, washed me, clothed me, adorned me.

I was once dead, I am now alive.

I was lost, now I'm found.

I was blind, now I see.

I've been reading a book called One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  In this book, she writes about her journey in how she learned to go from blindness to sight, how she learned to live in the moment, to enjoy it as a gift from God, instead of merely a transition into the next moment.  She began numbering her blessings, gifts from God, some that only she could see.  Like the way that the sun poured in through her kitchen window on a mound of grated cheese.  Who sees beauty in that?  She did, because the Lord knew her, that she would appreciate it.  He loves her, and gifts her according to what he knows that she will love.

 "If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!"

~Matthew 7:11

God loves me, and I love Him.  Ours is a relationship of hopeful romance.  I have hope in Jesus, that I will have eternal life.  I am His Bride, He woos me and showers me with blessings of His love, if only I have eyes to see them.

It comes in the forms of breathtaking color on the black arms of a gigantic maple.

The intricacies of snowflakes.

The sound of baby feet on the hardwood.

The smell of coffee early in the morning.

The scratches on the dining room floor.

The yeasty smell of bread dough on Famer's Market day.

That blissful feeling of that singular peace, that surpasses all understanding.

That, my friend, is why satan hates hopeless romantics.  Because they see the beauty in the tiny gifts that God gives, they enjoy them as gifts.  They revel in the joy and excitement of their Maker.  They are intoxicated by His love, it is displayed everywhere around them.  They can't help but want to praise Him for what He has done.  He loves them, and they see it everywhere.

May we ever live our lives looking for the gifts of God.  Yes, sin permeates the world.  It is grieving, and there is a time for that.  But as a general rule, the Lord has done so much for us, it is ours to thank Him, to enjoy Him, and to ultimately glorify Him and make His name known.

"When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers,

The moon and the stars, which You have ordained;

 What is man that You take thought of him,

And the son of man that You care for him?"

~Psalm 8:3-4

"How precious are your thoughts to me, O God!

How vast is the sum of them!"

~Psalm 139:17

"Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name."

~Hebrews 13:15

"That I may proclaim with the voice of thanksgiving

And declare all Your wonders."

~Psalm 26:7

blemishes or marks of love?

Today I am going to share something a bit unconventional- I may even seem a little off my nut but please, just bear with me...

  The other day as I was vacuuming and mopping our engineered hardwood floors, I allowed a small sigh to escape my lips and a few grumbling thoughts loose in my mind.  I was looking at the terrible scratches on the floor beneath our dining room table.  We had tried so hard to take as many precautions against such scratches when we first put the flooring down.  We were diligent to put "sliders" on the feet of every piece of furniture- but unfortunately, as we came to find out, even "sliders" can allow a certain extent of scratches.

  I was beginning to feel ashamed and maybe even a little bitter-  Why can't we just have normal looking floors? "People" are going to judge me on these floors- thinking that I don't take care of them because they are so scratched up! (Anyone who knows me knows that I am generally what you would call a "neat freak"- therefore, if there is ever any implication of neglect I am usually horrified...)

  

As my mop glided over the blemished wood the Lord took my thoughts captive- and He dawned a revelation on me.  

"Amy, how did those floors get so scratched up?"

  It wasn't because we didn't take the necessary precautions against the scratches (sliders) or had not

be anxious for nothing...

Hello, my dear friends!

So sorry to have been absent for so long... I came down with a cold on Sunday and have been up and down ever since- but I'm feeling much better today. :-)

The Lord was teaching me something this morning.  I was very worried and anxious, I was scared and nervous.  I started talking to the Lord about it and He caused me to remember this verse:

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."

(Philippians 4:6)

I began to obey.  I prayed for the Lord to help me in that area, to guide me- to take away my anxiety.  I thanked Him for the opportunity to talk to Him, that He is always there to hear me, and that He cares about the little things- the little things that blow themselves up and cause me to stress over them.

A peace began to wash over me. 

 "And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  (Philippians 4:7)

  This is my little brother Peter... I thought his smile was a pretty good reminder to not be anxious :-)

Are you anxious?  Is there anything that is making you nervous or scared?  

I always feel like it's ironic, so often I will feel down and start to complain- until I realize- have I even talked to God about it?  As I'm shaking with nerves and complaining that "it's" too hard, or "it's" annoying, have I bothered to cry out to Him who loves me the most?

Have you talked to Jesus about your fears?  Have you explained to Him that you know that you are weak, and you know that you need Him?  

Have you thanked Him for all of His blessings that He has already bestowed upon you?

Perspective is everything.  If we start praying and thanking God for His blessings, if our minds are focused on higher things, how small do the problems that we were so worried about seem!

We're So Blessed!

A few years ago our family received a magazine with this article in it- it has served as perspective to our family as to just how blessed we are ever since.... enjoy!

• If you own just one Bible, you are abundantly blessed.  One- third of all the world does not have access to even one.
• If you woke up this morning with more health than illness, you are more blessed than the million that will not survive this week.
• If you have never experienced the danger of battles, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation, you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.
• If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death, you are more blessed than 3 billion people in the world.
• If your parents are still married and alive, you are very rare, even in the United States.
• If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace, you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.
• If you have food in the refridgerator, clothes on your back, a roof over your head, and a place to sleep, you are richer than 75% of this world. 

Just a little more perspective...

Where's Your Heart?

"for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Matthew 6:21

Most of the time when we hear this verse we think of "treasure" as our money, but what else do we treasure?  What do we hold dear- everyone has it- that is much more valuable than all the money in the world?

Time.

(Clock sold here)

It's a tough thing.... so much can steal our time away if left unbridled- TV, movies, Facebook, Twitter, hobbies.... the list could go on and on.  Are we investing our time into things that really matter?  Because whatever the activity, worthless or not, our hearts are in whatever we spend our time on.

Food for thought.

When I sat down to write this post I was specifically thinking about my brothers and sisters.  Do they have my heart?  Am I spending enough on my "treasure" of time (and/or money!) on them?

What about the Lord Jesus? Are you spending your most precious possession to read His Word- to pray to Him and to enrich your relationship with Him?  Your life is a gift- He gave you the time that you spend now as you please... how are you using it for His glory?

Just been thinking...  I know I need to work on prioritizing where my time is spent!

How Do You Measure Up?

One of my favorite books of the Bible right now is Philippians- so many wonderful verses to "chew" on.

Here is one that I have been thinking about and would like to share with you:

 

"Only conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or remain absent, I will hear of you that your are standing firm with one spirit with one mind striving together or the faith of the gospel."

Philippians 1:27

 

I heard a talk by Francis Chan earlier this year discussing this verse.  He likened it to a scale- if the gospel of Jesus Christ was on one side of the scale and your life was one the other side of the scale- would it be equal?

Allow me to expound upon this...

The sacrifice of Jesus was so immense.  The blood that was shed- the pain, torment, mocking that he underwent- is enough to make any of us sick.  But a lot of people don't realize that that wasn't the worst of it.  God poured out His wrath upon Jesus.  Every sin that had ever been committed and ever would be was poured out on Jesus and He had to take the punishment for it all.

Does your life reflect your gratitude for what Jesus did for you?  (I know I definitely need to work on mine!)  When life gets "tough" do you lash out or do you remember how much more Jesus suffered and meekly endure?  How do you measure up to the standard of the cross?

 

Just what I've been thinking about this morning...

This is Not Our Home

When I tell people that I am the eldest of 9 children they usually (after they recover their jaws) ask a few typical questions.  One of my favorites that always makes me laugh is,

"So, ya'll live in a big house?"

Ha ha ha ha ha!

We live in an 1800 square foot home.  We moved in almost 6 years ago when there were only 6 of us children- we had previously been living in a 2400 square foot home up in the mid west but because we wanted to be closer to my grandmother who had cancer at the time (more on that later) we moved and bought this house to live in *temporarily* until we could find what we really wanted.  Well, the market was at it's height in '05 (when we bought the house) and ever since it has been plummeting.  Thus, here we are, 11 people in an 1800 square foot house, 1 car garage, 1/3 of an acre.

The Lord truly had His hand on us when we bought this house.  The way it is laid out is perfect for us...  The space was used very efficiently in the architecture.  We have four bedrooms and 2 bathrooms.  Learning how much (or rather how little) we should keep and how to efficiently store it all has been an adventure.

We have been trying to be faithful.  It's so hard when the world is pressing my father to walk away and go find a larger house. That would be so easy.  We could be in a nice house twice the size on at least three times the land in no time!  But we don't believe that is what God has for us.  My daddy believes that because he agreed to pay on this house, that is what he is going to do- leave the rest up to God.  We are all behind Daddy, we do our best to make this sweet little home as wonderful a place and refuge for our family as we can- and the Lord has been blessing our efforts.

Don't get me wrong- it is work. Me and Momma have become champions at Tetris (on a larger scale of course :) ) but it takes a lot of thought and time to figure out how to fit 11 people's clothes into 5 closets or any other conundrum that likes to rear it's ugly head.

But even if He wasn't blessing our efforts (it's up to Him- He doesn't have to!) I was comforted the other night by the words of Jesus, "In my Father's house there are many rooms, if that were not so I would have told you..."  (emphasis added) In this home on earth we only have 4 bedrooms, but in my Father's house there are many rooms.

"For our citizenship is in heaven, from which also we eagerly wait for a Savior, Jesus Christ."

Philippians 3:20

 

Theodore Roosevelt wrote:

"I wish to preach, not the doctrine of ignoble ease, but the doctrine of the strenuous life, the life of toil and effort, of labor and strife; to preach that highest form of success which comes, not to the man who desires mere easy peace, but to the man who does not shrink from danger, from hardship, or from bitter toil, and who out of these wins the splendid ultimate triumph."

This world is not our home.  Thank goodness for that!  In this world we will have tribulation.  We are supposed to work hard, to suffer for the gospel's sake.  I pray that the people on the outside of our life looking in are saying, "There is something different about them- they aren't choosing to be let off the easy way..."  When we get to that home in glory I believe God will say to my Daddy, "Well done good and faithful slave, because you were faithful in the little things, I will put you over greater things. Enter into the joy of your master."

No matter what situation you are in- sometimes life can be discouraging.  It is hard.  But we are not called to a life of ease.  Be encouraged- our citizenship is in heaven, in my Father's house there are many rooms, in this world you will have tribulation, but take courage- He has overcome the world. Remembering those sweet words,"Well done, good and faithful slave..." are well worth fighting, working, and persevering for.  Remembering that I will get a room in my Father's house- remembering my citizenship in heaven-that this world is not my home... it is only temporary.

Thank God!

 

"So how do you do it?"  may be your question now.

Well, I am going to begin a series next week on how our large family works: the ins, the outs, the loopty loops and so on.  Questions like:

"How are your bedrooms set up?"

"Do you have a TV?"

"How do you do your schooling?"

"How do you keep up with all the laundry?"

will be answered in the next several weeks!

Please send me some questions and I would love to answer them in the series!

amy@aheartsurrendered.com

A Reminder On You Desktop

The Bible says, "The heavens are telling the glory of God, their expanse declares the work of His hands..."

Wow... to think that the One who made that loves me!

 

I just thought that this was an excellent reminder of how great our God is...

 

Wow... if you have never seen Louie Giglio's Indescribable and How Great is Our God you MUST watch them!  Louie Giglio takes you on an astronomical adventure through photo after photo from the Hubble Space telescope (same telescope that took the above photos) revealing the majesties and the wonders of God.  I am dying to tell you the end of both DVD's because it is so amazing- but I feel that you must watch it... I don't want to ruin it for you :)

My original intention of this post was to tell you about how you can get photos like the above as your desktop wall paper here .  A constant reminder of how great your God is- and yet He loves you and me.

Right now we have the Sombrero Galaxy as our desktop  :)

 

Perspective...

Sometimes life can be frustrating.

Stuff to do here, there, EVERYWHERE!  Every time I turn around there is something new to do- something to clean, or fix, or organize, or repaint, rewash, or, or, or....  I can get so lost in the business and the craziness of life.  It's so easy to forget what really matters what the end goal is really. My body and brain feel so drained and tired that I feel like I can't see the light of day.   When I see my brothers and sisters playing all I can think of is the mess.

Know what I needed?

I needed my little 2-year-old sister, Violet, upon her first waking up in the morning and calling out for me, "Amy!  I MEED <need>you, Amy!"  When I go and pick her up, her chubby little dimply arms wrapped around my neck I get- perspective.  When standing before the judgement seat of God at the end of my life, is He going to ask how clean the floor was or is He going to look at the lives of my brothers and sisters under me which I had influence and leadership over and ask something more like, "Did you encourage you brothers and sisters in Me?  What did you do to bless them and lead them down My path?"

All of a sudden the fingerprints on the wall aren't as black as they were before.  The smudges on the sliding glass doors aren't quite as noticeable.  The board game that hasn't yet been cleaned up makes me smile when I see Violet in an intense play between the figures that make up the game pieces.

I'm not saying that we do not need to take care of our homes!

On the contrary, I believe that we must be good stewards of what God has given us.   But I simply believe instead of worrying about housework, care for little hearts.  Remember that they are eternal.  When you pass by someone who just so happens to be putting their hands all over the window that you just washed instead of getting angry with them, get a few rags and some cleaner and teach them how to clean the windows with you and teach them that it is not nice to ruin what someone else has done.  Chances are they weren't even thinking about what they were doing!

"for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Matthew 6:21

The house will someday burn.  This earth is not our home.  But my brothers and sisters are mine for eternity...  how am I going to treat them and be a good steward of their souls?

Image: vegadsl / FreeDigitalPhotos.net