when you're tired of just surviving

Survival mode.

Everybody has experienced it at one point or another.

For some, it's a season that comes and goes.

For some, it's every day.

Lately, it's felt like every day for me.  It's like I'm trying to fit everything in.

I wake up, and the rush begins.  Every moment spent just trying to get through the day.  Just trying to make it to evening.  Just.  Trying.  To.  Make.  It.  Through.

Survival mode.  I know it all too well.  I sit here and feel sorry for myself. 

I want to thrive!  I'm tired of merely making it through the day.  I want to MAKE each day something special.

I sag as I continue my survival charade, this dance that I know the steps all too well.

Until it hits me.

Yes, it's all survival mode.

Because my very survival is hinged on the grace found in every moment.

My year's word comes to mind: breathe.  As I realize, YES--this is survival mode.  But every day is for everyone else is, too.  It's how I choose to SEE.  

As I fold laundry a few minutes before I need to rush out the door, my shoulders sag.  If only I could get this done faster!  Have time to do better things!

And I forget the ordinance of God.  That my very survival depends upon His grace--and every moment that I spend breathing His grace is ordained by Him.  I forget that He ordained that I would be folding that laundry.  That I would run out the door in those few moments.  That I would spend all that time in the car driving.  That I would go work a few hour or a long hour shift.  That I would have to eat a PB&J on my dinner break, because I didn't have time to make anything else. 

And my perspective begins to change, as I ponder.  

And I begin to SEE... from God's perspective, He's given me all I need to thrive!  

From my human perspective, I have a hard time grasping...because it's not what I think I need to thrive.  I want more.  Of course!  More.

But He whispers gently, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness."

He always gives me enough to thrive. He is enough.  Even when it looks like I'm in survival mode, it's what He has given me to thrive, what am I going to do with it?  How am I going to make the most of this grace that He has afforded me?

While I fold, I can pray and sing.

When I'm sitting in the car, driving, I can listen to sermons.

I can be God's love to everyone that I meet on my shift, short or long.

I happen to love PB&Js.

Survival mode is enough to thrive.   His grace is sufficient for me.

Grace is enough.