for me, too

I sit, counting gifts, in the quiet.  Steaming cup of morning coffee by my side, the dawn's sunbeams beginning to peek in the back windows.

#96.  warm coffee on a brisk morning

#97. pretty pink pen

#98. dog sleeping peacefully

#99. dear friends

...and I stop.  I'm at 100 already?  I mean, I'll admit, I did start this thing months ago, but wasn't really being faithful until the beginning of this year...

What should I write for my 100th gift?  Shouldn't it be something special, something wonderfully profound?

I ponder, and remember something.

...and I write:

#100. grace

Okay, okay, I admit--it's beautifully Christianese isn't it?  :-)

Let me explain.

I find that I have a hard time remembering that grace applies to me too.  I mean, I talk about it all the time.  I preach it from the rooftops, I proclaim its promises upon the weary and broken...but I seem to miss it for myself.  

I realized this when chatting online with a friend the other night.  I was telling her about a situation in which I was fearful of the outcome because of some past mistakes that I had made.  I could almost feel her warm smile and arm around me when she said, "Ok. Let's move past that. We all make mistakes and God is in the business of redemption."

It sounds like the same old, same old.  But to me at that moment, it was like a flashbulb moment.

The words of a sermon by Paul Washer that I had been listening to not too long ago came to mind:

"How dare you think that your sin has more power than the blood of Jesus Christ? How dare you think that your puny disobedience is stronger than His obedience? 

You are dressed. You are dressed proper. You could go to a wedding at this very moment in the very court of God because He dressed you. And you are attractive to Him because He made you attractive to Him by His own work and if He hadn’t done it you would have never got there. 

It is all about Him." 

(Click HERE to listen to the full sermon or read the transcript--it's fantastic, don't miss it!)

I believed that His blood was enough for my sin in general, but for some reason, when it came to the everyday stupid mistakes that I made, it felt like I had to manage those on my own.  Pay for the consequences, deal with it.

Wrong.

God cares about everything.  Jesus' blood covers everything.  He is strong enough to overcome all.

He is powerful enough to redeem even me and my hopeless, everyday mistakes, distresses and grievances.  He is strong enough to daily cleanse me, to hourly redeem me, to forgive me and love me, moment by moment.

Do we deal with consequences from our actions and mistakes?  Yes.  

But the glorious promise that we have is that we never have to go at it alone, and that if we surrender ourselves to Him, He can take our weakest points and turn them into opportunities for His glory.

"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."  

~Romans 8:28

"...and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” 

~Matthew 28:20b

#100. remembering that grace is for me, too